Monday, September 6, 2010

Coming and goings of eternity: meeting again, still tasting delicious
Blessings of Staying Awake: Today my friend ME called from Canada. She reminded me of 'guest consciousness', a phrase that arose in the mind of me while I was traveling in New Zealand and a guest in Annette's home. ME has been using the phrase frequently, while I had forgotten it after I took it off the title of my book.
Spiritual Challenge: To remember that whether I am birthing from the womb or birthing from the heart, each is a holy offspring that needs to be nurtured. 'but no one listens' is not an option, I am need to listen. I need to listen!
Spiritual Practice: Make a list of the ideas that have come through me honor them some how!
Blessings of the Vav: I have fallen in love with AND because I want to de-but the world. First, I have to de-but my world and begin noticing how often i say 'ya, but! ' to my birthings. And LOL!!

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Collecting The Dots of Being 'Gotten'

Divine Sparks Creating the Universal Force Field
Blessings of Being Awake: There have been moments in my life when i feel I had been 'gotten'! There was no need to try to be any one else but me. And I felt the tenderness, the acceptance, the joy right down to my core that did not need to hide, be politically correct or 'hush-up'. Those are rare moments when I have met some one who knows me better than I know me, the Self that walks too often in fear, loneliness, straight-jacketed.
Staying home this summer, making my travels purely domestic, has offered me the opportunity to open my heart to me and the struggles of re-learning how to love me, by remembering those who knew what it was like to be different and found me in the crowd of their life, and bestowed their kindness in their joy of finding clan.
One of the dots I am collecting was James Kavanaugh, a poet who came to Aiken, SC in the early 70's, thanks to my friend Beverly, to share his work and self. He was my family's guest for a dinner filled with being seen with chesed, loving kindness. He wrote 'Wisdom is not taught. Systems are taught. Wisdom comes from experiencing life.' And my dear therapist Tim reminded me that being mindful of the experience in one's body-mind-spirit is the gift we give ourselves to help us 'get' ourselves! And to experience the experience I must be awake.
Spiritual Challenge: I am beginning to collect the dots, the moments, the experiences when i was 'gotten' and name them and celebrate those courageous souls. And what I am beginning to notice, is that what i learned from them unconsciously, I am passing forward. And I do, when i am kind, laugh at life, ask for a name, listen to a story, cry with someone, offer to sit beside someone in their pain, celebrate the joy of a triumph. That is my job and my life's work is to learn that what I do for others I must do for me, too. I know loneliness, too well. And I have been touched by the light, the ner tamid, eternal light of these holy souls.
Spiritual Practice: I often say 'I am blessed' when asked how I am doing by strangers. I say it not because I was feeling blessed in the moment before i was asked. I do it to remind me of the blessings bestowed upon me when i was not even looking. By collecting these dots, I am collecting the blessings of the many experiences i have been gifted with by the Souls who 'got' me. And in this holy month of Elul, I am asking them for fogiveness for not telling them 'thank you'. And I am forgiving myself for not noticing their light they so generously shared with me.
Blessings of the Vav: Jim has died without me telling him thank you. And I will share this blog entry with his family. The Vav, is so holy in holding the linking energy and the individuality of the self. I have been blessed to listen to my heart that sits in the emotional state of the body and honor the words that came to me by creating this blog. There is a Society of the Vav and it is coming alive like me.