Saturday, July 25, 2009

The Weekly New and Good

Blessings of Being Awake: Today I brought my 14 year old grandson Drew back to his mom after a fun, athletic, funny, exploring and bonding week. When I arrived back home the place felt empty and I experienced a feeling of loneliness . And as I was sliding down into the loneliness feeling the phone rang. TZiporah was calling for our weekly 'Shabbat new and good conversation'. We had promised each other to meet every Shabbat and share our good stuff that had happenned that week. She started off by telling me she was not feeling well and of a few disappointments. I listened and then said "what good happenned?" And as she spoke her voice changed and she began to sound energized and remembered lots of good stuff including a new client! Then it was my turn and she began with a questions, "Did you draw the picture of you with the magic wand?" Wam! She got me by reminding me of where I had left off before Drew came. I gotten so caught up in my grandmoher host role I had forgot the other parts of me!
Spiritual Challenge: In busy times it is so easy to forget me and promises I make to myself. So if I surround myself with people who love me and remind me of the good even then when I want to fall back into old habits and familiar pain I will be reminded of my choices. My week with Drew had been fantastic, I felt like a young woman sailing, snorkeling and playing tennis with this dynamic and very active young man. And now the vacation was over and reality set in and routines are hard to change if I keep trying to do that by myself!
Spiritual Practice: Take the ten minutes a day to meditate and remind me of my choice for gentleness and non-aggression. Keep my journal everyday and look back to see where I was and what has been happenning. Laugh a lot, ask for fogiveness when I mess up and keep placing me back into my heart where she belongs! Share good things with friends.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Living the Future Today

Blessings of Being Awake:I have been writing a lot lately of what my life looks like as if it was happening or already happened. I am imagining my future and loving the dreams and the sensations that arise.
Spiritual Challenge:Do I dare to be the wild thing that feels no self pity for itself and focuses only on staying on the bough? Am I GI Jane up for doing whatever it takes to be where I imagine myself being?
Spiritual Practice: Noticing the fear, the desire to stay in the "Goldilock zone of not too hot and not too cold "and breathe as I sail to catch the wind living my life fully.
Blessings of the Vav: I am complete and the story dynamically continues! TG!!!!

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Strategic Planning

Blessings of Being Awake: A friend asked me what I thought of Michael Jackson's death. I was surprised as I had not heard nor read anything. In that moment I became aware that I had cut myself off from the world outside my home. Occasionally, I am like these geese, head down, nose to the grind stone, a puritan work ethic taking over my life. Everything here is nurturing me why bother to look around?
Spiritual Challenge: A teacher once said if you are going to live a spiritual life you have to read the newspaper and watch TV. Wedemeyer and Jue write that to live a spiritual life means to transcend compartmentalization and have a balance in one's life. I need to pay attention to the signs that it is time to lift my head up and stretch my neck!
Spiritual Practice: To take time regularly to assess the balance of work-play, private-public, doing-being, solo-collaboration. This is all a part of being kind to myself, a Vav-nik.
Blessings of the Vav: I am complete and the story dynamically continues! TG!!!!

MULKA-Mothers United for Loving-Kindness & Allies

Blessings of Being Awake: I am aware of the disharmony in my body-mind-spirit universe that shows its head when I am confronted with unkind tones from an other. I do not like it. And I cannot figure out how to let the other know. The words are given to me feel sharp, dull and neither my heart nor mind is prepared and I am silent only responding from a place of fear of disconnection. I am in the midst of a monologue that I thought was a dialogue. And I can do it to others, too. I came home recently from a visit with my mother not liking myself. I was disappointed that I had not kept my promise to myself to be kind to her. I was attempting to break a family pattern. And sometimes I am not capable of pulling it off. Sometimes when I attempt to set boundaries I am awkward and my language patterns and my emotional intelligence are limited. I am feeling stunted.
Spiritual Challenge: Being loving-kind to myself when I do not live up to my own standards of behavior. To laugh instead of digging in the knife to cut out the bad stuff. And begin to peel off the outward layers of self doubt and getting to the core, my pure soul. And I remember to sing and LOL at and with me.
Spiritual Practice: Each day as I awake and look out at the water and trees and listen to the birds chirping and watch my chest rise and fall with each breath, I will remember I have free will and loving-kindness is a choice on the list of options and I can put myself at the top of that list.
MULKA: a virtual reality sponsored by the Society of the Vav.
Blessings of the Vav: I am complete and the story dynamically continues! TG!!!!